"Dodging the Judges" should be the title of this blog entry. How to create  beauty yet stay unattached? The line between investing oneself and remaining unattached is undefined for me when I create music in the moment.
On the one hand I can stay hyper vigilant, as during a performance where I straddle being in control, yet spontaneous enough to keep the listener engaged. My spontaneous creations demand flexibility and adaptability, yet clarity and pitch can be greatly affected during an improvisation if I am the least bit unclear. These issues come up when I second guess myself, because that split second of indecision comes through my voice as a faltering or (worse yet) flat note.

Then there are those inner voices that tell me things like...
I am repetitively rhythmic.
My melodic choices are banal and uninteresting (because I lack the proper theory?).
The choices for my solos sound too similar.
My sound vocabulary is too limited

Tonight I acknowledged the judgments and criticisms, but fragmented myself only enough to remain aware, while the rest of me flowed in the improv. It works much better when I stay open enough to flow. The second I try to control anything it falls apart, but when I stay open to the flow... Beauty happens!!! 

To listen to DailySing - 45, click here.